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Monday, September 19, 2016

Love life needed

Hello my sexy readers! I'm sorry I haven't written recently but I really haven't had much to write about unfortunately! My sex life has been at a stand-still sine Blondie found someone else. And since we are FB friends, I see he and his GF have officially broken up, which made me very excited! It's been a couple weeks now and I keep hoping he'll miss me and contact me, but it hasn't happened yet, so I'm moving on. Five and a half months and while he's been fucking his new girlfriend, I've been faithfully keeping myself hot and ready for his return, pushing away anyone else's advances. I've had plenty of opportunities but I just haven't wanted to take my clothes off for anyone but Blondie.

"Indiana" is in town, and writing me 24/7 to come over. When he initially wrote he'd be in town, I had every intention of seeing him if I hadn't heard from Blondie, but now he's here and I'm just kind of "eh". I told him last night I had a "horrible" cold (lie) and that I'd let him know.  I said to my BFF, "What is wrong with me??!!" She said, "don't you like him? You've fucked him before right?" And I answered yes, but that was last summer before Blondie and I got together.

I feel like I've really changed since I was with him. I don't like sex for sex anymore. I liked our relationship so so much! I trusted him. I did things with him I don't want to do with anyone else! I really feel like sexually shut down. I've BEEN shut down since April. We just had a connection like I've never had with anyone before. That shit doesn't just evaporate. It's like I'm stuck.

"F" is still very attentive, sending me snaphats every day. He is so fucking adorable. I think he's still seeing that chick but that's what he does--he can't stay faithful to any girl. He tries but then he misses me. He hasn't made an effort to see me although he seems to want to badly but stops himself. He's fun to flirt with and I think he's the only other guy right now I'd sleep with.

I DID meet someone new I'm smitten with, and I think I'm going to give him a chance. Two guys actually--the first is the hot rocker boy who came to my show last weekend. I fell for him before I even met him. I love his look. He's 26 and also a lead singer! He said he wasn't in a band right now but he's got the 80's hair-band look like he's in Motley Crue. After the show we were hanging out together and flirty and chatting and I just had to kiss him. I just left him standing there and smiled at him. The guys in my band were all hanging out together with some other rocker-types and it was just the best night. The gig went well and hey, I kissed a hot boy so it was a good night!!

The other guy is someone I matched on Tinder. I've "known" him for like 4 years--he's a bartender at our fav hangout! I did NOT know he liked me! He is SUPER hot. A couple of my single friends have either dated him or wished they'd dated him. He is the proverbial hot, young, muscled bartender that all the girls swoon over. It will be fun to see where this goes with either him or Rocker Boy.

Unless.....!!!!! Yeah, you know how this sentence ends.

Friday, August 19, 2016

I kissed a girl....and I liked it!!

Last weekend, my hubby and I had a night out that was super fun. We'd gotten a room downtown--it's a college town with lots of hot sexy young people--and had an amazing $450 dinner at an upscale restaurant, and it was still too early for nightlife, so we went to the casino and dropped a few hundred playing blackjack. It was fun but wow the money went faster than it usually does so we thought "we'd better get outta here!!" So we did. We Uber'd back downtown, stopped at our room to freshen up. I'd been texting a couple of hotties to see if they were interested in hooking up, but one by one they had some sort of excuse. I never mentioned my hubby (he was going to stay downstairs at the bar if I had a visitor) all I said was I had a hotel room. And at a 4-star hotel nonetheless!! Why are guys so fucking flaky??? All day long they beg for my pics and a date and then when I'm actually available, they scatter like cockroaches in the light. I truly don't get it. I looked damn good and it was a shame I couldn't find a young hot guy to share my room with me.

Soooo, we decided to go look for some fun then and since it was a beautiful, warm summer night, we walked to one of our fav dance clubs. It was only a couple of blocks, and as we stood waiting for the light to change to cross the street, I hear my name and it's a friend of mine I play tennis with! She's hot and blonde and single and had met up with another hot, blonde, single woman and a couple of other people. We all went to the dance club together. It was slow, too early (almost midnight!) and they decided to go next door to another dance club that was hopping and meet up with us later.

The music was loud and thumping, and the club was starting to fill up. We'd run into a couple of friends who decided to go next door to a club that was already hopping. My hubby and I sat down at the bar and ordered drinks and just people-watched.  There was a gorgeous dark-haired girl dancing alone by a table of friends, maybe eight people, and we weren't the only ones who couldn't take our eyes off of her. She had on a very short white dress, cute black stilettos, and she was dancing to the music, her eyes closed, in her own little world, just like the famous quote, "Dance as if no one were watching." And she was sexy and sultry and even I was getting turned on and girls don't turn me on!!

Next thing I know, my blonde friend and her group came back to the club, and we all descended up one the dance floor.  We dropped off our drinks and purses with my hubby who sat down at a table nearby.  The place was starting to fill up and we were all getting a little drunky. It was so fun. Hubby did come and dance with me and all of us were just having fun.

I was scanning the place and was so disappointed there weren't any cute boys at all, and most were coupled-up anyways. Then lo and behold I saw the dark-haired girl on the dance floor, holding hands with a very good-looking tall blonde guy, and they had major eye-contact and would occasionally kiss. Then I saw her grab the hand of the tall blonde girl my friend came with, and all three of them started a groups kiss together! The whole club was paying attention. I glanced over at my hubby, who'd gone and sat back down, and his eyes were big like, "WOW!!"

Then the three of them broke apart, and the tall blonde danced off to meet other people, and suddenly my tennis friend was holding hands with the dark-haired girl and her blond man, and then THEY were in a group kiss! I was giggling at this point. What a fun couple they were. I don't see people act like that at all where I live, everyone's so fucking repressed.

And then all three dropped hands, started dancing with other people, and guess who that other person was this time!! That's right!! ME!! I WAS IN THE GROUP KISS!! Mmm it was so hot. I hoped my hubby was watching. Turned out he was and he was as turned on as I was!! The dark-haired girl turns to me and got real close to my face and in broken English she said, "he like my husband" and then went on to say, "it only sex we like sex in my country do u like sex?" And she told me she was French and he was South African and that the two of them and their group all work on a boat and she's the chef!! She said her name was Kim. And she took my face in her hands and kissed me. I have never been kissed by a girl before and it was making me feel really turned on and I wanted more.

Then we went our separate dancing ways. After a song or two, I went to our table and plopped down in a chair and slurped up my drink: I was hot and sweaty! It was such a fun night. But it wasn't over yet! We decided we were getting ready to leave, and I saw the dark-haired girl now dancing with some random scruffy-looking young guy, and I knew I wanted to see her again. I went to the bartender and borrowed a pen from him and scribbled a sexy note and my name and phone number on a cocktail napkin.

I found Kim right where I last saw her, and just as I was about to go up to her she came straight at me and said, "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN I'VE BEEN LOOKING EVERYWHERE FOR YOU!" And to my added surprise she again took my face in her hands and kissed me a long, slow juicy kiss. It was so hot. When she broke apart I showed her the cocktail napkin and told her what it was and she tried to stuff it in her bra but her dress was high-nexked and she couldn't figure it out, so then she took the now-crumpled napkin in her hand and lifted her dress and stuffed it in her panties. And then she kissed me again and I said "write me or call me! I'll come see u next time your boat comes to Milwaukee!!" and then we left. My head was spinning, and not just from the vodka.

I think I've fallen for a GIRL!!

Monday, August 8, 2016

What love life????

Well hello sexy readers!! I'm sorry I haven't written much on here lately. My date with HH didn't pan out. He didn't flake out on me, it was the other way around. I thought he was going to meet me at my hotel around 11 pm, and he had said he was in a recording session that was running longer than he'd hoped (as a musician myself I've totally been there). I had to be up at 3 am for my flight to Virginia, so when he wrote me at 1 am, "what's your room number?" I slept right through it. Next trip.

Hubby and I went to State Fair Saturday, an I can't believe who I ran into--F!! OMG. Of course I was hoping to run into Blondie but it didn't happen. We were leaning against a small bar table, standing with a couple beers, standing in the shade. It was so hot and we were just standing there, trying to decide if we were done and ready to go home or stay longer, when I saw F in the crowd. And he was coming straight towards me! I looked hot and that's why I wanted to go to the fair! I was so hoping to run into Blondie, even though I had no information he was planning on going. I just felt it, but it was F I was destined to run into.

We all had sunglasses on, which was perfect. He was with a chick his age or younger, and she was super average. I was way hotter, and I could tell he noticed. I said, "Hi "F", and so did my hubby, and he looked right at me with the biggest smile, those perfect white teeth. If I had looked I'm sure I'd have seen a hard-on. His chick looked at me like "who the fuck are you??" It was epic. I am still
waiting to hear from him. I know he can't get me out of his mind. The two of them kept walking past us into the bar, and they apparently didn't find what they were looking for and came back out minutes later, and again, walked right past our table. F was literally inches away from me. He and I were staring at each other oh so sneakily from behind our sunglasses. Even my hubby said, 'he's totally checking you out." Hehehehehehehehe I'm all his. He just needs to ask.

Blondie is still with his chick, who must have one amazing personality bc she's really unattractive. Oh some pics of her she can look pretty but she's at least 200 pounds and she's only 21. I think, "I wonder what she's gonna look like when she's 45".  I pray he's hopefully missing me and jacking off to my pics. I will NOT contact him as long as he's with her. He needs to reach out to me first. He dumped me for her so I will not grovel. I keep hoping they'll break up and he'll come back to me, but I'm not sitting around waiting.

Or maybe I am. I haven't been with anyone else since Blondie!!! And it's not for a lack of suitors. I just haven't found anyone I'm that smitten with. They're all either too young and don't either have a car or an apartment or live too far. I refuse to do all the work. I"m willing to just flirt and wait for F and Blondie to come back, and if I meet someone hot I will def give them a try!

BTW I ran into Asian Stripper Boy in Kohls of all places!! He was like deer-in-the-headlights. I said, 'Hey you" and he just looked frightened so I giggled and went back to pretending like I was shopping. I was with my hubby and said, "did you see that hot Asian guy? That's Asian Stripper Boy!!" He said "damn no!!" And sure enough he texted me soon after and asked me to go dancing with him Saturday night. And then he didn't respond, and then he sent me a FB friend request in the middle of the night, which I accepted in the morning, and then he must've unfriended me bc I couldn't find him. And in the span of a week, Abercromie and Freckles have been snapchatting me, a new 18 year old and a new 19 year old that writes me every single morning, "hello beautiful" but I haven't made any effort to see any of them.

That's it for now my sexy readers! Hope everyone's having a fun and sexy summer!


Friday, July 8, 2016

Date with HH next week!!!

Hello my sexy readers! I've been away too long. Between recovering from my amazing cosmetic surgery, I've just been super busy getting back into the swing of things. My band has a big gig coming up, I'm traveling to DC next week, AND going back to California and I have a date with HH!! Yay!! I can't wait!! He confirmed he WILL meet me Thursday! Mmm that guy is delish. One of only 3 guys in my entire lifetime that have made me cum. And he's only 20 years old.

He'll be the first guy I've been with since Blondie dumped me for his new chick. I am so ready for some action! I feel super-confident with my new body and I'm ready to show it off!

I DID meet someone new yesterday! A very hot 19 year old I'll call Drew. He found me on OKCupid and since he said he didn't have a car (LOL) I drove to his work and picked him up! I had plans with my BFF's so I said let's just meet, I'll drive you home and if we like each other we can plan to get together another time. Since he can't drink, and can't drive himself to meet me anywhere, I just wanted to get the meeting over with. No sense planning something if there's no chemistry.

I was an hour and a half late, but let him know ahead of time I would be, and he said that was fine. He is a teacher! So I met him at the school he teaches at. He was hanging out at the park behind the school, and it was a super fucking hot and muggy day. By the time I got there, the poor guy was all sweaty, and I know he'd been up since 5 am, so I thought, give the guy a break. He needed a shower and probably brush his teeth LOL and here I was, freshly showered and shiny.

He was very cute. Skinny, dressed raelly cute, black skinny jeans and a short sleeved plaid button-down. He got in my car, and was smiling so big. I could tell he was really nervous. I forget to think about how it must feel to meet me--you know, a strange woman picks u up in a car and drives off!! I could be a serial killer for all he knows!! LOL

So we made small talk on the drive, it was super awkward. Imagine a first date that lasts 25 min. He was obviously smitten, and I wasn't sure. His teeth didn't look that white (sorry!! Certain things bug me!!) and he had a "man bun", which was cute. I thought about Blondie's man bun (which I hated tbh) but i knew it meant he had long hair and I love love love long hair on a cute guy!! So I imagined him all showered and shiny clean with his hair down. GRRRRR!!

So as we drove he told me he loves to read, and so do I. It was awkward but I was glad to just meet him and get it over with. It ended up he lies in a shitty area, reminded me of south central LA and fucking scary. I couldn't wait to get the hell back on the safety of the freeway.

He showed me where i could pull over and let him out. Maybe he didn't want me to know exactly where he lived!! I put said it was great to meet him, and he put his arm around me and started to kiss me. I don't know, I just wasn't feeling it! Call me shallow but I knew he needed a shower and a good tooth-brushing!! I could taste he was a smoker too, which sometimes turns me on and sometimes turns me off. This time it was a combination of both in the same kiss! LOL He was really going for it, and I was holding back. More than anything I was terrified of being attacked by some random black person at any moment. Seriously it reminded me of south central LA. I just wanted to get the hell out of there, and I was scared driving alone.

I decided he deserved a second chance! After all, he DID wait an hour and a half patiently to meet me and never complained about the heat. He writes me every morning, "Good morning beautiful" like Blondie used to, and it's just sooooo niceeeeee.

I did tell him his neighborhood was not the place for a girl like me and he agreed, so we are going to figure out a way to get together!

"F" is still very attentive, and is #26 on my FB "who views your profile" app. Blondie is way down at #166, BT it appears there's trouble in paradise between him and the new chick (possibly). She's been depressed and has posted things that my BFF has said looks like she's either been dumped or knows it's coming. Also, Blondie has announced he's getting things lined up to move to Colorado, so maybe he's not asking her to go with??? His profile pic is still the two of them all smiling and holding each other, so as far as I'm concerned, until he changes that profile pic, they are still very much together. But my BFF thinks he's just placating her for now. I guess time will tell.

TGIF and have a great sexy weekend everyone!!!!

Friday, June 3, 2016

Ready for some summer sex!

Hello sexy readers!

I haven't had much to write about lately. Ever since Blondie moved on, I haven't had much luck at all. Every time a hottie gets interested lately, they seem to have the same problem I believe Blondie did, which is, I'm married. It appears to be very hard for guys to accept that a hot married girl's husband isn't going to come after them with a shotgun. If I were to lie and say I was divorced, or separated, I wouldn't keep getting shot down (no pun intended!! LOL)

Every time I think, FUCK, there goes another hottie, I just want to scream. There was a super hot high school history teacher I'll call Joe, first year out of college. Twenty-four. He was a "10" for sure. Snapchatting me 24/7. We texted constantly. And then came the question: "how is it someone so gorgeous is actually single??" And whatever answer I gave was insufficient, and he's now ghosting me. He looks at every single snapchat story I post so he's still interested, or curious, or bored, but he hasn't responded to my last 3 texts. Why do guys need me to be single?? It's not like he or any of his young co-horts are looking for wives. What does it matter??!! It's like there's nothing I can say that reassures them sufficiently.

I decided that I'm not going to stoop to lying. It's just not in me. I'm a horrible liar. I'm good at exaggerating the truth LOL but I can't lie. I really can't. I would forget who I told what to, and I know how devastating it feels to be lied to, and I don't want to get involved with someone and then have to say, "there's something I need to tell you." So I will just keep being be, and "ME" is married. I'm not cheating. If you don't know what an "open relationship" is ask me. Or Google it, but it means different things to different people.

That being said, "F" is back! I can't remember if I have written about him on here recently, but yeah, he's back. We haven't gotten together yet  (he's still with his girlfriend!!) but true to F form, he gets bored eventually and comes back to me. And then strange thing is, I'm not sure I really care either way. He broke my heart. It was very hard getting over him. And of course my fling with Blondie helped heal that quickly. I was so happy with Blondie, "F who??!!" And then when that ended, I still didn't think of F anymore. I realized I was over him when he came back.

Things are escalating quickly. He is Snapchatting me 3-5 times a day now, which is unbelievable. I'd be lying if I didn't admit I'm flattered and intrigued. The last I sent him was a very sexy pic of me in black lingerie (F LOVES me in lingerie) and a caption that said, "I heard it's someone's birthday". Then another sexy pic,  with a caption I wrote that said, "I have a present for you." He sent a pic back immediately, a selfie of him in his car with that mega-watt smile and a caption that said, "tomorrow!" So who knows? Maybe we'll meet up soon. I will most definitely see him, but I know better than to get my heart involved again. He's too young--fuck he's 21 today!!! Younger than my SON!!!! And he will always have a "thing" for me, but like Blondie, will always want a girlfriend--the socially acceptable girl they can plaster all over Facebook. It's all for show.

I try not to make it a habit of looking at Blondie's FB bc it makes me sick to my stomach, but I can't help myself. I'm looking for the elimination of the "relationship with (new chick)" off his page. It's still there. And in my cynicism and heartache, I've spent way too much time analyzing their relationship. They fucking look like brother and sister. Fucking twins. Yin to each other's yang. I can't stand it. And then I get annoyed and think, "I'm done. I'm over you." And then I go and look at the app that tells me who's secretly stalking my FB and the previous man who was once my #1 is now way down to number #154. He's NOT thinking about me. Not right now anyways, and I have to move on. And sometimes I just have to force myself to be grateful for what we had and know that I don't regret a thing. Except not seeing the signs that he was struggling with me being married. I didn't want to see it, I didn't want to let it interfere. But it was there.

I do hope he will boomerang. I think that once you have that strong a connection with someone, that feeling never goes away. That all you have to do is think about that person, and BOOM it's there. Idk for all I know, by the time it happens, if it does, I won't feel the same way anymore. I got over F. I may get over Blondie too.

But he still has one of my earrings. A very nice pair that I thought would be super sexy laying on his dresser. I keep hoping the new chick finds it and he has to think about how it got there. And then, like he told me he did daily, jerk off thinking about me. And then maybe I'll get a text from him. Or he'll add me back on Snapchat.

I really must find someone new.

If you are a regular reader of my Twitter, you'll know that I recently had a little work done! I had surgery 2 weeks ago, and I'm still in the recovery process and have some residual swelling in my face. I don't want to talk about it other than to say, "LOOK OUT WORLD! ANNA'S BACK!!" I am super happy with the results so far; it's hard to know how it will look when the swelling goes down more but I've been told by a few friends that I look the same, only a much younger version of myself. I'm super excited for that. 

It's going to be a great summer!!!

Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Hubby fucks Asian girl

Hello lovely readers, its been awhile since I've written. Sadly, I haven't had much to write about. Blondie has moved on, and that's all I'm going to say about him bc I'm not sure if he reads this blog or not. I had told him about it months ago when we were still at the "friends" stage and had not yet met. Blondie, if you are reading this, well, I don't really need to say anything else. I think what I've already written about you says it all. I miss you terribly.

Deep breath.

In other news, my hubby had some fun a few weeks back, he fucked Ling-Ling! We had talked about it ad infinitum, and I originally had been totally okay with it bc I was seeing Blondie, and I couldn't care less at that time what he did. And then suddenly he had someone and I didn't, and I was getting those uneasy queasy feelings. I knew it would be shitty to put any kind of skid on his fun with her. I had no plans to do that. I had my fun, it was certainly his turn. He had a business trip out in LA where she lives, and had a free evening to see her. He made reservations at some swank bar and she met him there for drinks. Remember this wasn't their first date; they met a month or so ago and had a nice 3 hour date.

They had flirted before the date, she actually texted him, "drinks? Sex?" so he knew where the night was going to go. I was happy for him. I feel like he's earned it after all I've done, and after all we've talked and been through together.

Like I said, I assumed I'd be with Blondie on this particular evening, and when I realized I wasn't going to be, I needed to find some distraction. My friends were all busy. I have been writing new hotties, but didn't really like anyone enough to make a date tbh. There was one guy though I had stopped writing and thought, hmmm, he's hot enough, maybe I'll make the effort to meet him. He lived an hour away though, but I thought, what the hell else do I have to do, the drive would be good for me.

We made a date to meet at a cute bar halfway between us so neither of us would need to drive too far.

Then he cancelled. I knew it was an excuse. This happens a lot to me.

So I frantically started writing other hot boys trying to find someone to go out with me!! And there was one 18 year old that has been after me, well, he's been 17 and I refused to talk to him till he turned 18 and he finally did, so I finally wrote him "hey" and we agreed to meet.

He too cancelled. An excuse.

I thought, 'the universe is trying to tell me to handle this alone. Pay attention to your feelings. A distraction is not what you need tonight. You need to feel whatever you're going to feel."

So I got myself all dressed up and went to my favorite bar that over looks a beautiful lake. It's pretty casual and we frequent this bar so the staff would probably be nice to me and not treat me like the loser I felt like.

I went in and sat down and the bartender, an older gentleman who is very professional, was very nice to me as I needed him to be. I felt very awkward and was feeling better once the pinot I was drinking started to take effect. The bar was busy; there was a woman about my age next to me and I could see her giving me the stinkeye. Why is it women are so mean to each other???! Can't a perfectly nice woman go to a bar and eat alone for Christ's sake??!!

There were a few men to my left, one who was very drunk and very chatty with me. He was actually quite interesting: a physics guy who, he said, has "really, really, really, really, really, really, really" (add about 10 more "really's") " a lot of money." I nodded and chuckled, "That's awesome!!!! Good for you!!" It's fun talking to drunk people.

And I was becoming one of them, and what little filter I usually have was going away. I decided to kill the woman next to me with kindness and struck up a convo with her. By the time she left she was not only pleasant to me but I would say she would say I inspired her to be the best person she could be. I have that effect on people. I read them so well and reflect back what they want to hear about themselves.

What she didn't know was, while I was making myself out to be this lonely wife who's husband was out of town on business and who's kids were busy with their friends, my husband was on a date with another woman, and was going to fuck her. Yeah. Couldn't really talk about that.

I stopped at 2 glasses of wine, had a nice dinner, and went home. Unfortunately, it was only 9 pm my time, which was only 7 pm California time, and she hadn't even shown up yet. She was an hour late for her date with my husband.

I still had the whole evening left. And theirs hadn't even begun. How was I going to get through it????!!

I decided to listen to the universe. I went home and put on my jammies. By then my daughter was home, and I made us a big bowl of popcorn and we watched tv together. We laughed and talked and it was awesome.

Bedtime was harder.

My husband was good about texting me during their date. He was great about texting me as things were happening to make sure I was doing okay, and he was willing to stop at any point if I wasn't. It went from, "she's still not here" to "she's here and she says hi!" to "we are going back to her place, are you ok with that?" to "we stopped making out so I could text you and see if you're still okay".

I WAS okay. I wanted him to have his fun. I certainly had mine. And I was happy for him.

Until.....he stopped responding to my texts around 2 am.

The last I had heard from him was "we are done. Can I sleep a little? I don't want to drive back to my hotel yet." I answered, "yes".

See, what I haven't told you is I wasn't going to give him any rules, but to me, sleeping together seemed to intimate. I never spent the whole night with Blondie, even though I wanted to, out of respect for my husband. It was like, I had my fun, now go home. And my husband said he wasn't going to spend the night with her. His whole plan to go to her place instead of his was precisely for this reason. He even verbalized it--he'd told me earlier in the evening, "I don't want her to come to my hotel! What if she falls asleep?? How will I get rid of her??!!" and thusly that's why he decided to go to HER place instead. So he would have HIS car and be able to leave after.

I need to interject that this was the VERY FIRST TIME  since his infidelity he was going to be having sex with another woman with my knowledge. He needed to 'do it right by me". (oh, and the sex with the call girl a few weeks ago??? NO. I did not know about that till after the fact). This was murky waters he was treading in.

And 10 texts later, of which each of them was increasingly angrier than the one preceding it, he finally wrote back. Nearly 6 hours later. He had simply fallen asleep.

I was irate. It was the worst nights' sleep I'd had since finding out about his cheating. I was a total wreck. How dare he spend the night with her??!! How dare he ignore my texts for 6 hours??! I didn't know how I was going to get through the day. He was due to fly home and I didn't even want to see his face.

He wrote, 'just woke up. I'll call you in 5'.

It was just shy of 6 am California time. The last I'd heard from him was midnight his time.

My heart was pounding out of my chest. He called and profusely apologized. He said they didn't fuck again, nothing happened, he just slept. I was so angry. I said, "I've been sleeping with you for 26 years. You DON'T sleep 6 hours straight. Something always wakes you at least once and you look at your phone and go to the bathroom or something."

It got ugly. We fought via text all day, and when he got home it wasn't much better. Basically, he wanted me to give him the benefit of the doubt ("maybe he's just asleep? I'll find out tomorrow") which I was unable to do.

And I realized that if I had been with Blondie, I would've reacted totally differently. So for me, the experience was, I felt rejected and abandoned by both men. I couldn't yell at Blondie, but I could yell at my husband.

He admitted he was wrong. He shouldn't have fallen asleep. He should've gotten up and left like he said he was going to do. He truly thought he would "nap", and not a 6 hour nap.

And it's gotten me thinking in these last few weeks since he was with her, that I have been okay with it. REALLY ok with him seeing her. And i know they're texting. After all, that's what I do, right??!! Selfishly, it's been nice knowing he was still being faithful to me and not fucking any other girl. But this girl might be the reason I'm okay with it. I met her. She's sweet. She's super rich, single, 50, and not trying to steal him.

In other words, my husband can be happily married to me and still fuck someone else. And have a good time with her.

And I can do the same.

It works for us.

We just celebrated our 23rd wedding anniversary with an expensive dinner, and he gave me diamonds.

Because he feels free and loved in this marriage. We don't own each other.


Thursday, March 31, 2016

It takes two to tango

I met my husband in a swank bar we've been to before that's inside of the poshest hotel where I live. We drove separately for a couple of reasons: he was coming from work (it was closer than driving all the way home and back) and I needed my own car because I was meeting Abercrombie at 9:00 o'clock at the same hotel where we first met, which was about halfway on the way home. Just easier.

My hubby got there first and was sitting at the bar having a glass of wine. To his left was a very beautiful tall redhead. There was an older gentleman to her left and she appeared to be with him. I greeted my hubby and he got me a glass of wine and he offered me his barstool but that was too awkward so we both stood. Soon the older gentleman left (guess he wasn't with the pretty redhead) and she offered to move down a chair so I could sit down. Well, that's all it took to start a conversation that ended with her and my hubby naked in her room!!

But I'm getting ahead of myself!

After a few thank you's we sat down and she pretty much was into her phone and my hubby and I were chatting, catching up with our day. We ordered an appetizer and soon we were chatting with the redhead. I'll call her "Kallie". She was telling us she's a nurse for a spinal surgery center in Florida, and was here on business. That led to talking about medicine in general (our son is pre-med) and she was just so lively and intelligent and fun to talk to. The three of us had a great time chatting.

As our collective second glass of red wine became our third, the conversation got more personal. We began really sharing ourselves, all three of us, and she is just a dear, sweet, intelligent and incredibly beautiful just-turned-30-year old! We laughed and laughed.

She told us her side career is a high-paid escort!! She charges upwards of $1200 an hour!! We were like wow!! So she told us stories about the kinds of guys she'd been with. It was fascinating. I told her about my blog. It was fun.

Then we were talking about the cool bar on the 30th floor and the great view, and my hubby said, "let's go have a glass of wine!" and he sold her on the view and the chocolate covered strawberries.

Next thing I know we are having a 4th glass of wine (mind you, I barely picked at the appetizer) and was getting pretty drunk. We had a nice chat, and I was texting Abercrombie the whole time bc I was totally late! It was way past 9, in fact, it was way past 10 and I still wasn't ready to leave to go meet him. I was having a blast!!! I finally said, "I have to go! I have a date and I've kept him waiting almost 2 hours!!!" Turning to look first at my hubby, then me then back at him Kallie said, "you have a DATE??!!" To which my hubby replied, "yep, she does." and she said, "I KNEW your guys were like that!" He then started to tell her about Blondie--"she has a boyfriend" and then I corrected him and said "HAD a boyfriend, I haven't heard from him in two weeks." So I told her the guy I was going to see is someone I've known for about a year. We are just FWB. I have no feelings for him other than a casual fondness. I never care if I see him or not and never miss him. The sex isn't that good; the only thing is he's only 20 and has the most amazing body I've ever seen. He's very good looking too--pretty blue eyes and brown hair but nowhere near as good looking as Blondie. It's just pure, raw sex and it's usually over in less than a half hour. He's good for my ego and that's really about it.

I jumped up from my navy, velvet chair and said, "I gotta go!" I know they said goodbye but I honestly can't remember if I even kissed my hubby goodbye. I really had no thought about what Kallie and my hubby might or might not do. We had made plans to take her out tomorrow night to the casino, so it was a kind of "see ya later".

I shouldn't have driven, but I did.

I made it to the hotel before Abercrombie, but not by much! I had just gotten to the room when I heard him knock. I opened the door and he had a big smile for me. I said, "wow that was fast!" and he said, "I've been ready!" He came in and we chatted a little as it's been since October since I'd last seen him. He's a baseball player for his college so we chatted about that and how he's turning 21 soon. I just talked about the gym and my band.

I put on some music and we got right to it. I love kissing but found that I didn't like kissing him anymore! All I could think about was Blondie and how much I miss kissing him. He's the best kisser I've ever had and it just brought a flood of feelings I didn't want to feel. I mean, that was the whole reason for getting together with Abercrombie in the first place!!! To soothe my wounded ego and broken heart!!! Fuck!!!

Abercrombie stares at me almost like he's looking through me. I used to like it but this time it bothered me. I know why. Wrong guy.

BUT He is super hot. I can't deny that. Not an ounce of fat on that boy. His abs are why I call him "Abercrombie" bc he could be an Abercrombie model. He is THAT good looking.

I pulled off his sweatpants (why is he always wearing sweatpants??!!) and he pulled his red college T-shirt off over his head and tossed it. I was wearing a dress and did the same. I don't do much to him other than sucking his dick and fucking him. It's really not passionate at all. Nothing like Blondie. Abercrombie fucks. Blondie makes love. There's no comparison.

"Abs" loves the way I give head and he always wants me to start there. Which I do. Then he got on his knees, pulled my legs apart, and buried his head. It was hot but he didn't stay there long enough for me to get really aroused. And remember, I was pretty drunkie.

It wasn't long before he was reaching for the condoms. I love watching him put them on. Kneeling, kind of sideways, his dick was super hard like his muscles, and it's a beautiful thing to see. I love when a guy touches his own dick too, and seeing him holding it with one hand and very skillfully sliding the condom on with the other made me super turned on.

He grabbed me by my ankles and pulled me fiercely towards him. His hands still on my ankles (my stillettos still on by the way) he pushed them into the air and held them by his head and penetrated me with that hard cock. It felt pretty damn good. He wanted me to suck his dick some more so he pulled the condom off. I gave it a good sucking, and soon he was digging in the box for another condom.

He wanted me doggy style. That's his orgasm MO. Same every time. I obliged and got on my hands and knees, and after less than a couple minutes, he came. He took off the condom and put it in the toilet and we laughed because it wouldn't flush! We joked about what the maid would think when she finds it and what an awful job that would be to be a hotel maid! We joked about all sorts of disgusting scenarios and he kept flushing it and finally it went down. We laughed and came out of the bathroom and started putting our clothes back on.

We chatted a little more and he asked if I was going to stay there overnight. We had talked about spending the night together and he couldn't and I was relieved. I didn't want to, but I would've liked better sex. I didn't come and I wanted to! I said no, I was going home, so he said we should leave together. I said okay, so we did, I gathered up my few things and we walked out to the elevator together.

We kissed a quick goodbye outside the lobby, and that was it. I got in my car and finally looked at my phone, and my hubby had sent about 8 texts. Apparently, he had gone to Kallie's room and they were about to have sex! He was a bit drunkie too and his last text was, "I'm afraid I'm going to end up paying for this." I thought he meant that I was going to be angry at him but he was worried since she was an escort that she was going to charge him $1200!! I quickly wrote back, "on my way home. hope you're having fun!" I really wasn't jealous at all. I was too drunk and sad to feel anything else.

I got home before my hubby and fell right into bed. He texted me soon he was on his way and that he didn't fuck her. Apparently they did everything else though! I was happy for him. He said he felt too uncomfortable to fuck her and was worried how I would feel. He came home and fucked me hard and then we crashed.

I really don't know how I feel about anything. I don't know why Blondie hasn't contacted me in two weeks, and I am sick about it. I miss him, and the unknown is making me insane. Fortunately, there are plenty of hot young guys willing to take his place.

Hubby and I are taking Kallie out to dinner tonight and to the casino. Although I'm not into having sex with women, she is a doll and I wouldn't mind having a threesome with her tonight. I'll mostly watch, which is fine with me, and she can play with me if she wants.

You can be sure I'll tell you all about it tomorrow!

Friday, March 11, 2016

Anna's hubby gets some action!

Hello sexy readers!!

I thought I'd take today to fill you in on a couple things you may be wondering about, like, namely, my husband's love life!! Without digressing into the whole journey we took getting here, basically, you could say right now it's more equal than it's been in the last 4 years since I accidentally uncovered years of lies and infidelity. 

Basically, it's been mostly one-sided since we reunited in April of 2012. Of course I have had major trust issues with him, so he has refrained from having other women in his life until recently. It's not that he hasn't been interested in anyone; it's that I haven't allowed him to act on it. The first woman he chose was a co-worker (yes, AGAIN) and I forbid it. He willingly complied. Always worried he will cheat again--hence the saying, "Once a cheater, always a cheater", I made sure his leash was on tight at all times. Fearful of losing me, he obliged and didn't complain.

We've made increasing progress over the last two years, mostly because I had some epiphanies that began the night I watched my mother take her last breaths. And of course, weekly therapy for three years and anti-depressants during that time. And most of all, my steadfastness and earnestness to heal from the trauma.

I also made a New Year's resolution this last New Year's Day that I would not live another day in fear. With my permission, my husband went back on Tinder and OKCupid, and met someone. I'll call her "Kate".

I told him I needed him to take it slowly, and he was wonderful and said that was fine. He said all the right things; that "no one was worth" losing me over. still suffer from PTSD from all the trauma; just hearing his phone "ding" and seeing him holding it and texting his mother even was causing major distress to me. 

But I worked through it. And all this started way before I met Blondie. I wasn't seeing anyone, and here it was his turn for some attention. I did feel a lot of guilt that it was one-sided, but it was mixed with quite a bit of indignation in the form of "you should feel so fucking lucky you have ME!! How dare you want anyone else???!!!" 

But the REAL breakthroughs came when I went to California by myself in January this year. I spent a lot of time on the beach; the very beaches I grew up on that welcome me back every time with open arms. I had some epiphanies during my time on the sand: I ran every day, I played in the water, I meditated, I cried, I sat and watched the surfers, I gazed at the cute little sandpipers running back and forth with the waves, poking their long, skinny beaks into the sand for food. I took a zillion pictures. I never wanted to leave. I just wanted to curl up in the sun and sleep. I realized how eternal the ocean is--that it was here long before me. That is was there for me when I was growing up, and every time I return, it welcomes me with open arms and all it's grandeur and love. And long after I'm gone, it will still be there, giving its love to everyone who comes and seeks joy on her shores. 

I burst into tears when I realized that this is the love my husband gives me. It's eternal, it is unconditional, and what is MY love???!! The opposite!! It was quite a moment. I decided right then and there on my beach that I would try to love him the way he loves me. Starting right now.

Add to that, I met HH two days later, and I had such a fun time with him. And I continued to think, "I could fall in love with HH and would it diminish what I feel for my H (husband)?" And the answer is no. And he loves me enough to allow me to be whoever I need to be to be true to myself! Don't I want that for HIM??!! I would never get to that place if he had a leash on me the way I've had a leash on him. 

What I left out is, when I left for California, I was overwhelmed with anxiety. The worst I'd had in a long time. All I thought about night and day was him and Kate.  I'd "allowed" him to go on 5 dates with her!!! Nothing had yet happened aside from one kiss which made me go ballistic. I wanted desperately to be "ok" with them fucking but was holding the leash on them. I had been going to hypnosis also to try to re-program my brain from the trauma of being cheated on. It was helping but I still couldn't get there. 

I even made the effort to meet Kate and indeed we met her for drinks. I needed to try harder. Because my husband deserved it. He was trying so hard to do the right thing. She was SO nice, SO respectful, and we ended up being friends. Not BFF's mind you. But I believed her when she said she loves her husband and isn't looking to replace him with my H. I felt so good about her I invited her to come to our band's gig the following week.

And she came, and when I saw her, I was actually happy for my H. It was HUGE. Huge progress for me to see them standing together, body language showing interest in one another and thinking about my husband being naked with another woman. I had a few bad moments but I realized I could get past them.

So I was getting there, but increasing was my anxiety over "letting them" actually fuck. They weren't pressuring me for permission thankfully--the pressure came from within me. I was convinced that if they did, I would go into a full-on PTSD rage and I'd want to divorce him, and he was so scared that would happen, he said he had all but lost interest in her or anyone. 

So by the time I left for California, I was so worked up with anxiety about it all. I wanted so desperately to be a different person than I was. And I was trying so fucking hard to get there! What was my fucking problem??? The trauma. The cheating. It does REAL damage folks. Until you've been there, you have NO IDEA. And I had come a long way with all my therapy and meds, but still, the PTSD is REAL. And it can be REAL BAD.

When I returned from my trip, I felt like I had truly healed. My ocean, my beach healed me.

I told my H all about my epiphanies and of course he was happy for me but distrustful that it would last. And I can't honestly say he isn't right, but I am trying very hard.

The very next week he had to travel there himself for work and I suggested he look up "Ling-Ling" (not her real name) and see if she was interested in hooking up. She did want to see him! He met her at her work in downtown LA and they went out to dinner. It was about a four-hour date; it didn't end in sex, only a hug but they had a great time. I was actually totally fine the whole time bc my H was texting me the whole time, checking in with me frequently. He was so scared of doing the wrong thing.And he contacted her again last week when he was in LA again and she stood him up, but continued to send him sexy pics of herself and say "next time".

Enter Blondie.

Meeting him has made me appreciate my H even more. He is so supportive of our relationship because, and I quote, "he makes you happy."

I want to love him that much. And it has made me question so many things about myself, marriage, and all that stuff. But that's for another blog.

And when we were in LA last week together, we were at the hotel bar (Sunset Marquis mind you, not just your "average" hotel bar) and we were getting hammered. I was making out with some hot model and I realized later my H was making out with some older woman at the same time! We laughed about it later. We were both okay.

I had to fly home the following day and he stayed for work, and I told him to see if Ling-Ling was interested in seeing him. They texted back and forth, but ultimately, she was apparently too busy once again, but she IS still interested in taking things further and they have a tentative hook-up date for early April when he travels there again.

I know Kate has shown renewed interest in him as well, and my thing was always, "don't fuck JUST her", which is why I kept encouraging him to see Ling-Ling in California too. I was so worried about him falling in love with Kate and I thought if he had more than one woman that would be less likely to happen.

How silly I've been.

Being with Blondie has opened my eyes to a different perspective on things in so many ways. And of course, a lot of it is in the abstract bc it hasn't happened yet. My husband has NOT fucked another woman since September 2011. And I know he's super conflicted about it.

The night we were at the Sunset Marquis and we'd both been making out with other people, we got separated from each other and found each other by one of the outdoor pools. I can't remember a time when we were that drunk. I was mostly giggly (I get like that) but he was almost desperate. He was so upset at what he had done and was beside himself. When we talked the next day, I realized it was bc he hadn't had a chance to ASK me if he could make out with this woman. He felt like he'd cheated on me again and he was just sick about it. He stopped himself from going to her hotel room by getting up and leaving the bar when she said she had to go use the restroom. He came to find me and was scared when he couldn't find me initially.

I said to stop worrying, it was fine. Even though he was drunk, he stopped himself from fucking her. I was proud of him. And if he hadn't?? I guess I would've freaked out! He's right!! But maybe not, bc Blondie and I had just had two amazing dates before our trip and we were texting the whole time I was there. I've been in La-La Land ever since and it's like nothing bothers me now! I'm floating up above and sharing the loving feeling as if I were a hippy on acid. Love, love, love, like the Beatles song.

I realized later too, that my H has really no rules or leash on me. I have to be the same for him. I WANT to be the same way.

If I want to fuck someone, I just tell him. BEFORE I do anything. And that's really our only rule. Let each other know BEFORE anything happens. But then like that Saturday night at the Marquis, sometimes, you get into a compromising situation and the request for permission doesn't happen. I have to be forgiving and flexible.  I have to know my husband's heart. It's called TRUST.

And I can truly say, four years after D-day, that he has earned that trust back.

Thursday, March 10, 2016

For Blondie

One of the most precious moments of my life was the moment about four weeks ago when Blondie said to me, "I want to ask you to be my girlfriend, but you're married. So what do I do about that??!!" I responded enthusiastically, "I can still be your girlfriend!!" He answered, "you CAN??!!" And I said, "YES!! I CAN!!" He then asked me what was my definition of a girlfriend, and I said, "well, she's someone who hurts when you hurt. She's happy when you're happy. And she will do anything in her power to make you happy". He responded with the most beautiful smile, sparkly eyes, and a passionate kiss.

During our date last Friday, as I was driving him home, he asked me about my husband and how this all works. I was unprepared for the question, and I was driving, and having ADD I can't really do two things at the same time well LOL and I think my answer was inadequate. I wish I'd explained it better to Blondie, because I care so much about him and wish I'd given him a better answer. And being that I'm much better at expressing myself in writing than talking, I thought I would answer his question completely here today.

The answer is, "easy". I don't have to "do" anything differently if I wasn't married.

To me, being Blondie's girlfriend means what I told him. That when he hurts, I feel his pain as if it were my own. When he's happy, my world is sunnier. It's really that simple.

It also means I always have his back. It means I never stop thinking about him. And I never will. I will always want to do whatever I can to make him happy. I want to give him everything and be everything to him. I want to go places with him, laugh with him, lay with him. Cook for him, take care of him, buy him things, make him things, and just plain BE with him. I want to be a part of his life. I want to meet his mom, his friends (I've met his roommate!! And he's totally sweet to me!). I want him included at Thanksgiving and Christmas. He makes me feel like I'm the most beautiful woman in the world and there isn't anything I wouldn't do for him.

So, the real question he might have really been asking me could've been, "Do you have enough time for me? How do I share you with someone else you live with?" The truth is, sharing me is really about time management. We all lead such busy lives. We have jobs, friends, families, hobbies, all sorts of responsibilities. We juggle constantly.

Being Blondie's girlfriend, to me, means he has moved to the top of my list. He is a priority. He is right at the top with my husband and my kids now. Because of the way I feel about him, that's where I want him to be. I can't imagine him being anywhere else. Does he feel this way about me? I don't know. I think he does, since he's the one that asked me to be his girlfriend. I know he's never dated a married woman before, so I know he's not certain how this will work. All I know is, he makes me super happy and all I want is more!!!

Maybe he wonders about our sex life. Do I still fuck my husband? How is it he's really ok with this? I hope that if he wants to know anything, all he has to do is ask. 

I wish I could go on Facebook and click, "In a relationship with Blondie" the way other people can, but I'm sure it wouldn't let me. Maybe someday Facebook will progress to allow someone to be married and "in a relationship" with someone else at the same time. I want bragging rights too!!

But it all comes down to this: All I really want is for him to truly know that yes, I am honored to be his girlfriend, and I want the whole world to know he's my boyfriend. 

He's amazing! 

Sunday, March 6, 2016

Best. Date. Ever. And the jalapeno incident

Yesterday was Date #4, and it was epic.

I've been on cloud nine and I am not coming down anytime soon.

Since he can't drive since his knee surgery (and lack of working car), I picked Blondie up at his apartment yesterday at 8:15 am. He texted me he was ready by 7! Is that hot or WHAT?! I was smiling like crazy. I had to wait till my daughter got off to school.

I was so excited! I was bringing him back to my house! He was going to see where I live; my life, my home, my animals, my things. I felt so vulnerable but it was really, really exciting! I cleaned for like 9 hours the day before so everything would look nice.

He just loved it; he was so complimentary. I gave him the tour and on his crutches he went up and down all the stairs so well! He had been texting me the day before that he wanted to make this black bean salsa, and I was going to make my "famous" guacamole, so we had brought all the ingredients. I was so excited, I was not hungry at all, all i wanted was to get naked with him but I was like, well, this is what he wants to do so that's what we will do.

We finished the tour of the house, and we were in the kitchen and I can't remember what he said but i think I thought he wanted to make the salsa & guac, but thankfully mid-sentence he cradled my face in his hands and started kissing me! It was deep and long and sooo passionate. When we broke apart, he said he'd been wanting to do that since I picked him up!! (Happy dance!!!) We couldn't stop kissing and pressing our bodies up against one another. I said, "I don't know about you, but I'm really not thinking about avocados right now!" lol and he kissed me again and said "me neither". I said, "Want to go upstairs?" and he kissed me passionately in a definite "yes".

We were smiling and happy and he hobbled upstairs, always the gentleman though by letting me go first. When we got to my bedroom, he plopped down on the bed, arms outstretched over his head confidently, ready for action! He looked so gorgeous. He had his long gorgeous mane of hair up in a "man-bun" but of course he still looked so fucking sexy. I had lit candles before I'd left to go get him and my bedroom looked and smelled inviting.

I climbed in bed with him, and he explained about his knee, which was wrapped well. It had only been a week since his surgery so it was much much better but still quite sore and we had to be careful! I was so happy at the progress he made and that he was able to have sex!! I immediately straddled him and we began making out. He is the most amazing kisser; I love the way he bites my lips and sucks them. I've never been kissed the way he kisses me!!! It really gets me going.

I helped him take off his shirts, and he asked if I'd like to help him take off his pants! Well DUH!! That was so fun! I had been wearing leggings (first time he'd seen me in anything but a dress!) and he lifted my top up over my head, and I took my leggings off. Of course I had a super sexy bra on, my pink one with rhinestones around the edge, and a pink lace thong. And I love the way he takes a deep breath when he sees me undressed and tells me what a beautiful body I have!!! (happy dance again!!!)

We kissed and I licked him head to toe, and he was ready to fuck me. We fucked so hard, and it felt so good to feel him again, and he came pretty quickly. It made me happy. What I love is how we really don't stop just cuz he climaxes! He caresses me, he kisses me, he stays inside me. We don't stop and clean up. It's so exhilarating! I've never had sex like this ever. He is one fucking hot sexy lion with that long blonde mane. Oh, speaking of which, after we'd made out a little, I asked him if I could take his hair down and he said "do whatever you want!" Cuz I love love love his long gorgeous hair!!

So he came, and we kept going. So much passion for each other! What I love so much about the way he has sex is, it's making love. It's not just "sex". He's not grabby, he's not selfish at all, he doesn't hurt me in any way. He loves face-to-face sex and he seems totally into me! And he's so complimentary, and he's so sincere. I don't think there's an insincere bone in his body. He's so real and so present. He makes me feel like the queen of the universe!!

So we kept kissing and fucking and he came a second time. I was on top and afterwards, I just stayed on top of him, my head off to the side on his shoulder, our bodies warm and sweaty together. I never wanted to let go. I then did something I've never done to any man that I can remember--I put my legs up around his torso, and hugged him with my full body and said, "i'm giving you a whole-body hug". He hugged me back, our bodies so close if I could've gone inside his skin I would have. I felt like we were one. It. Was. Amazing.

We stayed like that for some time. It was beautiful. I climbed off him and we were cuddling. Finally I giggled  and said, "let's go make our food!" and he agreed! So he put on his boxers and a shirt, and I put on a sexy red negligee, and we went downstairs. He kept saying how much he loved my house, and how he wants a house like mind someday. He loved the kitchen too, how big it was and all the stuff I had that he needs like measuring cups and stuff.

So, he was making his salsa and I was making the guac and we were chatting and listening to music. It was soooo fun doing some random domestic stuff with him!! We got out some tortilla chips and tried our creations, and fed each other. It was so fun. I had a jalapeno pepper I had put in my guac and he decided to chop some up and put it in his salsa. They were both pretty yummy, but feeding each other, we started kissing like we did that first night at his place when he cooked for me. We were hungrier for each other than we were for the food and decided to go back upstairs! We put the food in the fridge and made our way back up to my bedroom.

We came upstairs and he was as attentive as ever. He is so loving in the way he touches me. I just can't get enough. He had that gorgeous face of his deep in my pussy and licking me so perfectly. I took a picture! Oh my god, it makes my heart skip a beat to look at it, and my desire for him just builds. I had told him I wanted to swallow his cum, and he said he was going to ask me if I would like to do that! He pulled me down to the edge of the bed and started fucking me, my legs in the air around him. It was very fulfilling and hot, and I especially love the way he looks at me right in the eyes while he's fucking me. He fucked me really hard, full of desire, and then said he was going to cum if I wanted to swallow his cum and I said "yes! yes i do!" then he gently pulled out and stuck his dick in my mouth and he came inside it. I swallowed every drop; he was so delicious. I felt so good making HIM feel so good! I love watching him cum; he's truly so beautiful, and I love the look on his face!

I was thrilled I made him cum three times! We took a very short break; he starting fingering me and all of a sudden I had this horrible burning sensation deep in my pussy and it was hurting so bad!! I was so worried, I was like, "wtf is this???!! Did he give me some kind of infection??!!" Seriously I was starting to freak out. It really hurt. I thought, "do I tell him?? What will he think?"And then he took his fingers out and put his cock inside me, and as he was fucking me, it hurt badly and I had to make him stop! I put my hand on his tummy and said "omg I'm so sorry but my pussy is on fire!!!!" He pulled out slowly and said, "So is my dick!" He laid down next to me and the tip was bright red! We were both in so much pain! We both said at the same time, "jalapeno!!!"

We realized that he must've still had jalapeno juice on his fingers from cutting one up and putting it in the salsa!! We jumped up and ran to the bathroom! He was standing at one of the sinks, splashing cold water on his dick and I grabbed a washcloth and ran cold water on it and shoved it inside my pussy best I could! We were moaning in pain and laughing at the same time! It was painful and hilarious at the same time! We fell back in bed, me holding the cold washcloth I'd shoved into my vagina, and he was holding the tip of his penis in his cold hands. I asked him if he would like a cold washcloth and he said, "oh yes!" so I got up and got one for him!

We laid there, laughing and moaning. After about 15 min or so, we both compared notes and realized we were much better, so we started kissing and making love again. I don't remember why--must've been in a response to something we were talking about--Oh I know! We were talking about him taking pics of me and us. He said he has a really awesome camera and I said I woud ld love that. That I have lots of clothes and costumes and really love dressing up! Then I remembered something I had in my closet, so I told him I'd be right back. I came back with my white feather boa! He LOVED it!! We played with it together, and I got a beautiful pic of him wrapped in it. He kept saying how much he loved and "has to get one". I told him at one point, "close your eyes". He did, and I teased him with the feather boa, slowly touching his body with it, up and down, all over, his face, his cock, his balls, his tummy, his chest, back up to his face, and all over up and down, slowly, very slowly. His cock let me know he was absolutely and thoroughly enjoying it!

I got on top of him and put that beautiful hard cock of his inside me and he came for the fourth time! This time, the ecstasy in his face was something i'd never seen before. It was so beautiful, so real, so hot, so consuming, I was like WOW I'VE FUCKING DIED AND GONE TO HEAVEN. Having daytime sex was so much better than nighttime cuz I could see his face so well!!!

He was spent after that. He was, of course, still so very loving. He wanted soo badly to make me cum and he'd tried so hard. Being the amazing lover he is, he didn't stop. He kept caressing me and kissing me even though he joked how spent he was! I was so happy to have made him cum 4 times--AGAIN!!! LAST WEEK WASN'T A FLUKE!! I MADE THIS GORGEOUS MAN CUM 4 TIMES IN JUST A FEW HOURS!! I mean, how fucking hot is THAT?!!

I was still so fucking horny! He wanted to make me cum so bad, and I wanted that too, more than anything, but it just wasn't happening. I could tell he was getting frustrated and upset, and that didn't help. I said, "I'm sorry I'm taking so long" and he was so sweet he said something like "it's fine take your time, I want to make u cum so bad". But it just wasn't happening. I was too self-conscious. And he would touch me in just the right place, and i would say, "oh my god, you're going to make me cum" and he'd start rubbing my clit harder or move it further down and I'd lose it. I wanted him to make me cum so badly too! He was kissing me, and I broke apart the kiss and said, "I'm sorry I'm taking so long. Maybe I don't want to cum". He said, "how come?" I answered, thinking of what my BFF said to me, "Bc I will feel too much for you." He breathed, "feel it. Go there", and that's all it took. He made me cum.

It was a big moment. So special. I had told him how only 3 guys in my whole life had made me cum, so I hope he knows how special he is. And not just for that reason of course!!

After my wonderful journey to the promised land, we laid there and talked and kissed. We kept laughing about the "Jalapeno Incident". I said, "We have a great story we can't tell anyone!!!" He said, "Oh, I'm going to have to tell people!" Hmmm!!! Who would he say he was with when this happened??!! Maybe he would just tell his roommate who is super sweet to me.

He asked me to go to a sex shop with him! He said he wanted to get a cock ring. I said, "Who for?" and he said, 'for you!' and proceeded to explain how his ex-gf liked deep thrusting (ew) and how I like it clitoral, so he wants to get that and try it with me! I thought that was so sweet! He also said he wanted to drive by some big houses. I said, "let's get dressed and go!!' so we did.

It was fun driving him around my neighboring neighborhood, where the house start at just under a million. We share a backyard. He took snapchat videos and it was so fun cuz later I watched them and you could see the Union Jack mirrors of my car. Of course I was hoping friends would say "who's car is that you were in???'

Unfortunately, I got off at the wrong exit and got us lost. We ended up close to his neighborhood, and he asked sweetly if we could go another time? He had his "ma" coming to visit and he had a bunch of stuff to do, would it be ok if I took him home? I said of course! We can go another time! And it was so fun having him in my car and driving him around. The whole day was surreal: having him in my car, in my home, meeting my pets, fucking me in my bed, chopping vegetables in my kitchen. I just stare at him, so smitten, hoping he doesn't tire of me and find someone younger and cuter.

Driving home, we were stopped at a stoplight and he said, "omg at least 10 cars looked at you!" I said, "maybe they were looking at the gorgeous guy in the passenger seat!!! He was like no, they were not looking at me. So cute and humble. I'm sure they were. He's so beautiful.

We made plans to go on hikes and do other fun things together, but not the zoo cuz he "hates the zoo"!! LOL But he loves aquariums. I do too! I told him about the ones in California. OH!! I forgot to tell you! We are going back to Cali in August, and my hubby said we should get a group together and all go. My BFF has asked for the time off and she's going! And I asked Blondie to go and he was like, "OH YES!!!"

Soooooooo.....I really like where this is going. I personally cannot get enough of this incredibly loving, fun, exciting man.

It's almost 3 am now, and I must get to sleep.

I. Am. So. Happy.

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Lucky girl

I have been SO busy I haven't been able to write about my second date with Blondie!!! I'm glad I did sit down and write those initial thoughts because I don't want to forget a thing!!

When we were talking about me being his girlfriend, he was looking me straight in the eyes. Serious. He then said, "there's something I have to tell you." I said, "tell me anything!" He said, "I'm not going to stop talking to other girls, but you're the only girl, I mean, woman, that I will sleep with." I was WOWED. Completely wowed. I'm sure that sentence led to more kissing and fucking! I felt amazing, like this incredible man was handing me his heart on a silver platter.

I take that very seriously.

Did he really mean it?? Or was that just a passion-of-the-moment chatter?? I fear so much it is, although everything I know about him leads me to think he truly means every word he ever says. To me, to anyone. He's not a player, he's so down-to-earth and REAL. I've never met anyone like him, so easy-going, so comfortable in his own skin, someone who walks on the sunny side of the street all the time! I feel such a kinship with him we are so alike!!

But i'm getting off point. What I want to know is, does he truly mean that? We are going to be sexually exclusive?? Because I still have all these guys writing me that I've been juggling, one in particular I was planning on seeing last week but lost interest (because of Blondie of course). And I'm going to California this week and I had been planning on seeing HH again. Does Blondie not want me to be with anyone else?? Am I ok with that? Is that what I want? I've never had anyone ask me to be exclusive before. Of course I would be exclusive with him! I just need to know he really truly means it. This is new territory for me. It feels sooo good to feel like I mean that much to him! I mean this guy is fucking gorgeous, I mean, he's not just a 10 (hell, he's a 15) but he's such a sweetheart. He's such a catch. And I know girls swirl around him, and he's choosing just ME??!?! Could I possibly be any luckier???!!

I am more than happy to be that person for him. And ESPECIALLY get rid of guys who just want pics and blowjobs. It makes me sick now.  Because all I've wanted all this time is that one guy who wants a relationship! I look at all of them and think, 'well, that was quite a few toads to get to my prince'.

So now I have a king and a prince. Am I the luckiest woman on the planet???!


So, you want to hear more about the sex?? HUH??! DO YA DO YA??!! Do I know my readers or what! LOL

Next time, sorry, time for tennis!

Have a great day my sexy readers!!


Anna xoxoxo

Friday, February 19, 2016

I'm a smitten kitten

So much happened last night, and I'm afraid I'm going to forget some things if I don't hurry up and write them down.

Blondie asked me to be his girlfriend! He said, "I want you to be my girlfriend, but you're married. So what do I do about that?" I said, "I can still be your girlfriend!! " He answered, "you CAN??!" And I said, "yes I can!" He smiled one of those gorgeous smiles of his, his eyes lighting up like sparkling stars, and he excitedly leaned over and kissed me.

Date #2 was even more amazing than the first. I left his bed just shy of 3 am.
He came 4 times. I have never had sex like that ever, and he told me I was the best lover he'd ever had! Now isn't that nice to hear???!!! AND OMG OF COURSE HE'S MY BEST EVER TOO!!!

He just kept saying things that were so wonderful to hear. Like how beautiful he thinks I am, how amazing he thinks I am, how he never stops thinking about me. And he wanted to reassure me of that. That even if his texts aren't frequent he never stops thinking about me. That sometimes he just thinks things and thinks he's talked to me! Like the other night, I wrote him at 8:30 pm and said I wanted to see him, was he free tomorrow? And I went to bed at 11:15 and no response. I told him I was so sad and felt stupid and vulnerable, assuming he was trying to figure out how to let me down easy. He was so upset at hearing this! He said, 'omg no no no!" He explained how he had sent me a text saying "yes" he wanted to get together but then his phone died. Then later the text went through, and yes, I woke up at 1 am to go to the bathroom and there it was, the words I badly wanted to hear, "lol I was just about to ask you the same question! yes I'm free tomorrow!"

And I have a tennis match right now so I can't finish this, but I will when I get back.

I'll leave you with this--I. Am. So. Happy.


Friday, February 12, 2016

My night with Blondie

"Ahhhh....No words right now...Just ahhh :)"

That was the last text I got from Blondie after I left his apartment last night! I have never gotten a text like that EVER. And I have never met anyone like him.

We have actually been Facebook friends for a year! We initially "met" on Tinder and had starting writing on FB messenger. I scrolled back and was surprised it has actually been a year! I wasn't really sure why we had never hooked up. I thought it was something like I'd be his first "MILF" and he was kind of back and forth about it,  so we had become friends. I never thought we'd ever meet let alone do what we did last night!

It all started when I realized on his FB that he and his girlfriend had broken up. I knew he was madly in love and she was his age (23) and very pretty. Just what he needs at his age. She had moved overseas for a few months, and he was so excited for her to come back at Christmas. And then, suddenly, she had disappeared from his FB page. And he had posted something that struck me hard, it was something about hope and faith and all, and I just melted. I decided to write him a PM (it had been months since we'd written) and the rest, they say, is history!!!

He wanted to cook dinner for me! Now that's truly the way to my heart! My hubby cooked me breakfast 26 years ago, and here's Blondie cooking for me. No other guy in all those years ever cooked for me. And I had never gone to a guy's apartment before!!! I was very excited and very nervous. He was SO excited. He wrote me how he was cleaning his apartment and wanted everything to be perfect for me. Lots of texts back and forth about would I like this or that? I liked everything. I told him I'd bring the wine!

He met me at his door and it was like time was suspended. We just smiled at each other, and hugged, and kept smiling. I was super nervous, and he admitted he was too and was drinking a beer while cooking cuz he "needed to chill!" He was as hot as his pics. And there, talking and walking and it was so awkward and fun after just seeing still pics of him for a year!!! He was gorgeous and had a great body, and I just kept staring at him. I couldn't get enough. He has long blonde hair, past his shoulders. I told him he looks like a lion, with that blonde shaggy mane. So hot.

Soon after I got there, I was playing with his cat, crouched down, and he said something and I looked up at him and he said, "you look so beautiful right now!" OMG THIS IS WHAT I'VE WANTED FOR SO LONG!!

So we took our dinner plates and sat down in his living room, and we picked at the food. It tasted delicious, but we were so attracted to each other, we weren't really hungry! I would take a bite, then take a forkfull and feed it to him. It was sexy. And at one point, he just leaned over and started kissing me! It was so fun and he was way yummier than the dinner he cooked, which was amazing by the way. His cute kitty was sitting under the table, looking at him, and he picked up a piece of chicken and licked off the sauce and gave a little piece to him! I was melting. What's more attractive than a guy who's in love with his cat???!! And his cat gave us lots to talk about when there were lulls in the conversation. His cat is so adorable and has such a fun personality. I wished I'd thought ahead to bring a cat toy or two and told him so! I said "I was so nervous coming here I just didn't think of it!"

Dinner was so fun, feeding each other and kissing while chewing. I'd have a bit of sauce on the corner of my mouth and say, 'oops!" and point to it and he'd kiss and lick the sauce off. I sent a few texts to my hubby off and on and I said "I hope that doesn't bother you" and he said "Oh no, do whatever you have to do!" I wanted to make sure he was still okay.

We seemed to be kissing more than eating, and I told him, "I was thinking of bringing dessert, but I decided instead to BE dessert!" He smiled and grabbed me in a big bear hug and kissed me more. I think he liked that idea! So with that, we were done eating and brought our plates into the kitchen, the bottle of red wine I'd brought was empty!

He took my hand and he was skipping down the hallway to his bedroom!! SKIPPING!!! How adorable is THAT??!! He'd given me the tour when I first got there, and it was so hippy-like. So cool. I loved it! He has two tapestries up and I just thought they looked amazing. I loved the colors and I loved that it was all HIM. It is so exciting going into a guy's bedroom!! You really get to know the person they are from the things they surround themselves with. No football trophies here. There was beautiful music playing, soft colors, the teal colored tapestries, a small wooden desk, a brown futon, and a full-sized bed with a brownish-reddish cover. Earthy tones everywhere for this amazingly earthy guy. I felt like I was hugged just walking into his room, so inviting.

I breathed in and took it all in. I was in his bedroom! He took off his shirt first (he said it was his fav shirt, although he loved dressing up and thought about wearing a tie! Isn't that adorable??) He has a great body and he's very very cute. I don't usually go for blondes but that mane of hair and those blueish-green eyes and disarming smile caught my heart.

He helped me pull my dress off over my head and he came over and kissing me, he nuzzled my neck and my breasts and just started to devour me. I couldn't wait to lick him all over.  He laid down on the bed, still with his jeans on, stretched out with arms behind his head and said, "do what you want to me"!! Yay!! So I slid his jeans off, and played with that peeping-cock hiding behind his pale blue boxers. That didn't last for long, cuz I couldn't wait to take it out and play with it! And I did, I slid them off slowly, licking that stiff cock all over, up and down, it and his balls too. He was nicely manscaped and I showed my appreciation! I licked his tummy all over, up and down, up and around and made my way up his neck. I loved his neck and all that hair in my face and bit and kissed and licked his neck while he moaned and grabbed my ass. I made my way to his hungry mouth and he kissed me like he was starving for me.

And when he entered me it felt amazing. It hurt a bit since we didn't have any lube and he's quite endowed, but it still felt great. We kept saying we couldn't believe we were really here with each other.

He loved licking my pussy too!! Yay! Finally a guy that will lick me!!! He said he "aims to please" and he wasn't kidding!! We fucked and sucked and licked and kissed for a couple hours; he came twice and we almost ripped each other's clothes off and went for round 3 but I decided I didn't want to come home late to my hubby. It was hard leaving him, and I loved that he wanted me to spend the night. We took a couple selfies and they are so sexy!! Mmmm. If I never see him again I've got 2 great souvenirs.

We made all sorts of plans about what to do next time, mainly, me staying longer so we can be together longer! Smoke some weed and fuck. Have him come to my place and meet my cats. He said things to me no one but my husband has ever said to me. He said how he felt such a connection to me. How real I was. How he'd never met anyone like me.

And the real test is always the next day: will he still feel the same way? Or was that just sexy talk from being in the moment? And I got texts from him first thing this morning! I guess he meant the things he said and wants to continue seeing me. Why am I always surprised???

Well, I'm not going to second-guess this and just enjoy it and see where it goes.

On cloud nine today!

Monday, February 1, 2016

Tinder hookup success!

Today is my birthday! And I'm on an airplane as I write this. I just had a wonderful solo trip to California. It's my third solo trip and I've decided I need to continue to go solo every winter. I had an unbelievable trip!

My beloved hubby planned the whole trip and surprised me! My dad is getting on in years, and since my mother passed away almost 2 years ago, I've been trying to fly out to see him and see how he's getting along. And there's not much better than leaving the frozen tundra to go to sunny Southern California in January!!! I had so many lightbulb moments. I have to make sure I write them all down.

I did spend most of the 4-1/2 days I was there driving. Driving in crazy traffic to go visit everyone I wanted to see while I was there. I also made sure I had "me" time, and twice I went to my old stomping grounds, Huntington Beach, for some alone time. To rejuvenate. There's something so special about the ocean, but that's for another blog.

My hubby desperately wanted me to get fucked by a young stud while I was out there. He said, "all alone in a nice hotel, what a shame it would be to not have someone keep you company??" Am I not  the luckiest girl on the planet???? I started looking before I even left! I changed my location on my Tinder and OKCupid so the boys would start lining up. And did they ever!!

But what's so funny is how flaky these guys are. 99% of them are all talk. Most just want nude pics to jerk off to. Here I am, a real-life unicorn, and they're afraid to show up!! Why is that??!!

I wrote B in Hollywood, and he was so happy to hear from me. We chatted back and forth, and ultimately, I got a better offer and decided not to drive the one+ hour drive each way. Also, Felippe, from March of last year came back into the picture and was very complimentary and seemed like a "sure thing". Ha. NOT!! Again, all talk.

As the days were passing I was getting hornier and more and more frustrated . I had been writing several guys but none hot enough to really make the effort. I REALLY wanted Felippe, who again, seemed like a "sure thing", so I kind of stopped really pursuing anyone else. I had 3 nights to have sex with someone. So the first night was a bust, cuz Felippe said he was "going to Vegas" but would be back the following day and 'definitely" wanted to get together. So I made plans to see a friend of mine, and we went to a fun bar nearby but didn't meet anyone.

The following day, it was hard writing back some of the guys bc I was so busy either driving several hours or visiting family and it was rude to keep staring at my phone. I was starting to think Felippe was going to flake out on me and I needed a back-up

That was the beginning of the smartest decision I ever made!!

I found a hot 20 year old who lived---are you ready for this??? THREE MILES AWAY FROM MY HOTEL. How perfect was that????!! It was the universe telling me to see him. 

At this point, it was like 9 pm and B and I were going back and forth. I even texted my BFF and said, "who should I pick??" She said go for B. But I know how flaky he has been in the past that made me wary driving all the way to Hollywood and back late on a Saturday night. 

The guy who didn't flake out was the 20 year old I'lll call HH.

His texts were so genuine and sweet. And so complimentary. And he really wanted me.

We agreed to meet at the hotel bar. Even though he couldn't legally drink, we needed a place to meet. And I needed some liquid courage myself.

I put on the sexy matching bra and panty set my hubby gave me for Christmas, and took a pic for him and sent it to him. He was almost as excited as I was. He said he was getting super hard but would save it for me. I put on a cute sundress that's given me lots of success (I wore it when I met Abercrombie, and he said, "you're prettier than your profile pics!". I call it my "good luck fuck-me dress").

HH's face was kind of hard to see from his Tinder profile pics, but I liked everything about him. He looked tall and skinny (my fav!!!) and he was young and a musician.. He had dark hair and looked very good looking (good facial structure) but I honestly couldn't really tell what he looked like. I was taking a huge gamble here but overall I thought he looked cute enough that there would be a spark.

We agreed to meet at the bar at 10:30. I got there about 10:15 and ordered a glass of Pinot and a shrimp cocktail. I hadn't eaten all day and I knew if he was cute I was going to need the energy!!

I swear to God when he walked in the lobby (at precisely 10:29 mind you) I wasn't sure I was going to like him.  From the distance he looked almost too young. I always worry cuz these young guys will lie to me about their age. He came over to me and I got up to greet him, and up close he was beautiful. And to my surprise, he was Japanese!!! He was seriously beautiful. His almond-shaped eyes were happy and intense, and he was smiling and so friendly and outgoing. We sat down together and I wanted to put him at ease as fast as I could. As we chatted about his music (he plays the banjo!) I took his hands in mine and they were ice cold! And he was shaking he was so nervous! It was adorable and I found myself becoming quite attracted to him very quickly.

I said I'd warm them up for him, and I did!  We held hands, both hands, and chatted for an hour!! We have music in common, and he knows Synester Gates from the band Avenged Sevenfold (my 2nd fav band of all time). He's a college student, third year, a music major (or course). The bartender brought my shrimp cocktail but I didn't touch it. I asked him finally if I could have a box for it. 

I was a few sips into my second glass of wine when it felt right to finally say, "ready to go up to my room?"  and he smiled and said, nodding, "yes". I settled my bill, grabbed my glass of wine and I guess the to-go box (although I have no memory of actually carrying it) cuz I was holding his hand as well as we went up the elevator and down the hall to my room. I gave him the key (it was like a credit card) and he waved it over the door handle awkwardly (again, so adorable) and the green light lit up as if to say, "ladies and gentlemen, start your engines" because I tell you my engine was revved up, and I'm pretty sure his was too!!

I think I used the restroom first, and then he went. I remember saying later that if he needed to go again could he leave the door open and let me watch? He giggled and I think that freaked him out a little. But I hadn't eaten anything and the wine hit me hard. I was happy and light and giggly too.

He was dressed quite smartly; expensive jeans, ripped at the knees that looked really good on him, a button-down blue and red plaid casual shirt, and a black leather jacket that went just below his hips. He took off his leather jacket, and I had one on too, We tossed them onto one of the queen beds.

I honestly don't remember disrobing, except I remember him helping me take my dress off (over my head) and I remember getting a good look at his rock hard abs and unbuckling his belt. My favorite part!!! And I unbuttoned his fly and unzipped his pants and like magic, they fell to the floor! 

Next thing I remember we were on one of the beds and we were kissing and kissing and kissing. Fuck he was the best kisser. He never let up! His body was hard and soft and it felt sooo good touching him. Our bodies were intertwined and a blur of kissing and touching. I tell you, this guy was AMAZING. He even spread my legs and licked my pussy!! He was no amateur I tell u that.

We literally couldn't get enough of each other. It was so fluid and easy. He was so different from every other guy I've ever been with. He didn't choke me like Jordan, he didn't just want a BJ like Freckles, and he didn't insist on doggy style like Asian Stripper Boy. He was more like F. Who I fell in love with.

Well, I have replaced F with this guy HH. He's the only one I want now (besides my hubby of course). 

He was amazing. I know that word gets thrown around a lot, and it's overused. We had so much chemistry. It was like that cliche'd "we became one". He never stopped kissing me except when I was sucking his dick or he was licking my pussy. I have never been kissed like that ever. I felt like I was out of my body and in my body at the same time and in his as well. We totally became one. 

And he was a willing learner. He was touching me and trying so hard to make me cum, and I was more turned on with him than I've ever been with anyone other than F and I wanted so badly for him to be the guy that would take me there. I moved his hand a couple times and said breathily, "ooo right there, yeah" and he obliged and didn't feel any ego. I would say, 'is that okay?" and he would answer, "oh yeah, that's so hot,I want to make u cum" and I told him how only 2 guys in my whole life ever made me cum and I wanted him to be my third. I said how I can't relax but how good he made me feel. He said he loved hearing me moan, which of course let me relax even more and moan more, which made hHis kiss me deeper and deeper and fuck me harder and harder! 

And guess what??!!!

He made me cum! He touched me perfectly and I was so aroused I came so quickly. I had the hugest orgasm, and the whole time he was looking right into my eyes. I could tell it meant a lot to him to be able to please me. I knew I could never get enough of this guy. My orgasm ignited even more passion in him and his kisses were so deep, and I loved the way he'd suck and bite my lips.

He came after about an hour or so (I only know this in retrospect) and here's the amazing part--while he was cumming and after, he never stopped kissing me! So many other guys, especially Abercrombie, wipe up and are done, put their pants back on and leave.  Oh. My. God. We kept going. HE kept going. He didn't play with himself to get hard again like some guys do either. Our bodies were intertwined and he just kept kissing me. I have never been kissed like that ever, ever EVER!!! It was so fucking erotic!

So guess what!??

All that kissing made him hard again so we got another go-round of licking, sucking and fucking!! It was insane. We would talk to each other too at times, we were so into each other. I said at one point, "I'm falling for you. I could fall in love with you. Would that be okay?" and he moaned and said, 'oh, yessssss, that would be so wonderful, you can fall in love with me and I'll love fall in love with you too."

I felt so happy and complete.

And all that kissing and moaning and loving and fucking and sucking led to him cumming a second time! He was on his knees as I sucked him and swallowed it all. He tasted delicious. His orgasm was so intense, he threw his head back, and his dick was so hard it was so erotic. I never want to forget that pose. He was so beautiful.

After his second orgasm, he laid down next to me and again, our bodies were totally wrapped around one another. Where one began and the other ended was a blur. And he kept kissing meI! I wasn't sure how much time had passed and I didn't give a fuck. There was no plan, just emotion. I didn't know if he was going to fuck me again and go for orgasm number three or go home. I didn't know if he was going to spend the night. I know I didn't want him to leave that was for sure

We laid there in each other's arms for just a little while, I think till he could catch his breath. The kissing subsided sadly and I knew he was going to get up and leave. Oh, I forgot to tell you he let me take a nude pic of him "just for me so I can play with myself and think of you when I get home" and after he dressed he asked for pics of me too and took several. I had put back on the bra and panty set for the pics. I know I don't photograph well and jokingly said "let me see!" and he would show me and I said "oooo delete! Take another!" so we did that like well uh, Japanese tourists hahaha (pun intended) several times till I was satisfied with the pics.

We talked about getting together the next night too. He was all I wanted. When he left he gave me more of those insanely deep kisses and as he walked out, we both smiled at each other and he blew me a kiss.

I haven't heard from him since.

My heart (and my girl parts) are aching for him. I was devastated he never wrote me back about getting together. I did send him two pics, one from the beach and one I had taken days or weeks before where I looked really pretty and he did respond "looking good" with a smily face with two hearts for eyes. The most romantic emoji of all.

I don't know what happened, I have learned that sometimes I just can't know what I can't know. Maybe he has a girfiriend. My BFF says maybe he's freaked out cuz it was so good. I don't know. But I know I will never forget him and now I have a new standard. 

She reassured me by saying, "he will never forget you either."

I think I fell in love.

I'm so lucky my hubby isn't threatened. He knows the love I have for him eclipses all others. 

I now know what I want. I want HH and if I can't have him (let's face it, we live 2000 miles apart) I want someone just like him.