Back to the drawing board.
New Guy will probably not be mentioned again after today's post. I think it's super interesting that not only could I not think of how to address him when I talked about him let alone on here was probably a premonition. I'm so annoyed. I texted him again one last time last night, I simply said, "I miss your daily phone calls. Hope all is well with you."
Crickets once again.
And what pisses me off the most is, he made a point to tell me more than once how he's the kind of person who's "so blunt it offends a lot of people" but the truth is, he's a coward and an asshole. To just ignore me is cowardice and douchebag behavior. So much for being "blunt".
I deleted all our texts so I'm not tempted to contact him again. And why would I be tempted to contact him again? Only to show my anger and contempt for him and I don't want to do that. I want to just "go away" as he's hoping I will (apparently) and take the high road. I KNOW I didn't do anything wrong. The day before he stopped responding to me we had insane video sex and he'd responded how hot and sexy I was. So whatever is causing him to act like an asshole, well, it has nothing to do with ME.
I like that I'm handling this additional rejection well. It happens so often I can't possibly take it personally. I think these young guys are mostly all talk-like Hairy Guy got cold feet at the last minute and admitted "sexting is fun but I don't think I can go through with it." I think they just like the free sexy pics and the IDEA of me. And also, I'm married. They want girlfriends they can take home to their roommates and not be embarrassed about. Once Blondie got a female roommate, he refused to have me over bc apparently, he was embarrassed of me. I refuse to be someone's embarrassment. I will keep looking until I find someone who will like me the way I am. What hurts is New Guy and I had these conversations and before we even met we both wanted the same thing. Being almost 28 he seemed more mature than Blondie (who's barely 24).
I'm not going to waste a minute putting myself down. I always tell myself, "If I don't have any information to go on as to why they stopped contacting me, what good does it do me to put myself down?? I mean yes, I am the common denominator. BUT both guys' last interactions with me were highly positive. So if I have no idea why they lost interest, what good does it do me to put myself down? If I have to write the story, why say "oh it's bc you're old. They saw your flab. They saw wrinkles. I'm not 24." blah blah blah Why not tell myself, "They stopped contacting me bc they couldn't handle me?" and "they're immature" and "probably want a girlfriend/marriage/babies and I can't give them that."
It saves my ego and it's probably the truth. But there's really no excuse for just "ghosting" someone you've been involved with except to label that person a douchebag.
At least Blondie always wrote me and told me why he couldn't see me. He gave me that. He has never ghosted me. And he's younger than New Guy. And here I thought NG would be more mature.
Apparently, age is not an indicator of douche'ness.
Happy Monday y'all.