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Monday, February 18, 2013

Catching up

Hello all you sexy lovelies out there! I wish I had some sexy stories to share. Sadly, I have none. Well, Valentine's day was a bit naughty as I got a pic from Jake that literally made me drool. I should post it on here--I should crop his face out of it and post it. It's a pic of him with just a button-down shirt on, unbuttoned and open, facing a bathroom vanity, holding his (ahem) 10-inch dick in his left hand. Scrubboard stomach. Sexy and skinny. Makes me squirm in my panties just thinking about it! (he is now almost 20 years old....yes, I fucked him when he was just 18). And what a great fuck he was. Yum yum yummy, I really do hope my H and I get things squared away so we can have some fun soon. We are in this awful no-sex dry spell that is not getting any better.

And my Allen texted me a sweet Valentine's Day rose. Yay! That was so sweet ;)

Hubby surprised me with a card that was so sweet it made my son's GF cry when she read it. It was awesome. He also gave me a new Mickey and Minnie Mouse stuffed couple (my favorites!) and cooked me an amazing lobster dinner with raspberry champagne. It was so sweet. He is really trying.

But no sex. I've had bronchitis and a fever and he just let me sleep. I wanted sex anyways; he didn't. I had even showered and put on a bra and panty set he'd given me.  Hmmm.

Weird that I still feel close to him. Guess that's good.

It's been so long now I'm finally starting to really miss it. That's a good thing. I hate dry spells, especially when they are because we are not getting along. He's on a business trip now and it's going ok. Hope I'm feeling better by the time he gets home so we can get our sexy on again. Him turning down sex? That's unusual. He said, "I'm not feeling sexy" and something about "how we related to each other sexually has changed." True. We are not involving other people right now. I'm not seeing anyone else and neither is he. Can we still be interested in each other???

I haven't heard a peep out of Mickey (not the mouse, the asshole) since that email July 31, 2012. I have stalked him and his GF online and he is completely off the map now. He has deleted me off his yahoo messenger, and he has deleted his facebook and every website he used to be on. He is completely offline. She isn't though, and I found a new website she's on that posts pics like Instagram but for iPhone users. It was hard seeing them; pics of him (only one of them together, in a canoe) but there's a pic of 5 red roses taken just 3 days ago, "from my sweet boyfriend". A pic taken from a text he'd sent her from his iPad. Little jokes between them. I shouldn't torture myself that way but I do. I do tell myself I'm better off without him and the truth is, I really don't miss him except once in a while. Guess today was that "once in a while" sort of day. Just curious how long he can keep this up.

I need to focus on ME and get my life together. I am living in the past and I'm stuck, stuck, stuck. My therapist says I'm still grieving the losses; I think he's right.  I'm sick of dealing with the aftershocks of his infidelity. If I choose to stay with him, which I have, I have to continue to deal with it. Some days are easier than others.

Sigh.

Nighty night friends. Hope you all are having lots of honest, protected sex! NO LIES!! NO CHEATING!!!