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Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Sexy pics for you!

Good morning dear lovlies! Have you enjoyed the pics of my sexy men I posted just for you??? Aren't they delicious???? Feel free to leave me your comments!! And NO you cannot have their phone numbers!!!!

I still don't know when we will get to hook up though unfortunately. My hubby and I are still riding the fucking rollercoaster of his infidelities, and although things are going well, it is still too tenous to add other guys sadly. I do miss my hotties, but they have to be an addition to my life, not a substitute for my hubby. And right now we have to get solid before we go back to swinging again.

We do both miss it. It's just harder now. I'd be ok if he never wanted to be with another female, but how fair is that?? It's not, but hey, I didn't ask to be cheated on so that wasn't fair to ME. I allowed him to have HER but he lied and cheated on me behind my back about her so HE IS THE ONE THAT FUCKED IT ALL UP. 

I am working on me. We are talking more, counseling has been helping. I am trying to find my way. The cognitive dissonance of infidelity does SO much damage, if I can implore you all to be HONEST in every way with the significant other in your life. This whole notion of "trying to protect" them by withholding the truth only hurts worse when the truth finally comes out, and believe me, IT WILL COME OUT. It took 16 years for the truth of his first affair to come out, and it hurts worse and makes it that much harder to recover from. I look at him and wonder, "who the fuck is this person I've been married to all these years??" He's had this secret double life I had NO FUCKING IDEA about. Trying to rebuild trust is THAT much harder by his cowardice in not coming forward. 

If you've cheated on your significant other, I beg you to come clean RIGHT THIS VERY MINUTE. They deserve to know. They deserve to be able to make their own choices and not have you manipulate them to stay with you. That is honestly the hardest part--I hate my husband for not giving me the opportunity to decide  FOR MYSELF if I wanted to stay with a cheater. He manipulated me into staying for 16 years by withholding the truth from me. How can I ever forgive him for that?? And, in addition, I gave up my friends, my family, my life, my kids' friends and life, to move clear across the country for him. Yes, it's been a good move, but that is because THAT IS WHO I AM. I MAKE THE BEST OF IT. I have moved with him over 8 times during our marriage, and if I'd known he'd cheated on me maybe I'd have divorced him 16 years ago. Or three, after the second affair. HE CHEATED ME OUT OF MAKING CHOICES.

So I implore you to remember this quote from survivinginfidelity.com---"The truth hurts, but lies hurt more."

Enjoy you life by living authentically.

Go and be happy my sexy readers.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Sexy skaterboy is back

Hello all my sexy readers! How are you all doing??? I am sure you are all having way more sex than I am these days. Yep, me and the hubby are still in a funk. It sucks. And it seems the cuties are coming out of the woodwork too. 

I got a random "hey" text from someone I had forgotten; someone I haven't met but have previously exchanged lots of sexts from. I'll call him Damien. He is 26 and lives in Chicago and OMG what a hottie!! Cute skaterboy. Wears his ballcap sideways and his jeans low. I swear I should crop out his face and post his pic with his sexy body for you so you don't think I'm making this shit up.

I have gotten some more sexy pics from Jake as well. Two sexy Chicago boys and who knows when the fuck I'll ever hook up with them??? The whole "open marriage" thing is off the table right now and we can't even talk about it. My H is out of town for work and yeah, I could go and fuck these two hotties and not tell him like he did to me but I'm not that kind of person. So how is it he was...? It's maddening. No wonder we are stuck.

I miss my old life. I miss my sexy young hotties. I miss the way they made me feel. I can't in good conscience go and fuck them now. I deleted my Adult Friend Finder profile and my Cougarlife. They are GONE. I don't miss them...but I met both my Chicago boys on them so I know it was good for me there for awhile.

Sigh.

Enjoy the pics! Have a great day lovers.

Anna XOXOX